Coward

I’m a coward because anytime anyone has ever called either of you out has been willed out of existence with your over inflated sense of moral and intellectual superiority.

I’m a coward because I can’t count how many times you looked the other way as you walked past my room when I was crying and felt so alone in the world.

I’m a coward because when I gave you a present you never acknowledged it and left me to find it amongst rubbish in the garage.

I’m a coward because your circumstances are so unique they prevent anyone from questioning your behaviour. 

I’m a coward because neither of you apply the same harsh rules to yourselves as you do to others.

I’m a coward because you turn on the charm offensive as soon as you sniff out the faintest hint of generosity like hungry ghouls only to disappear once what you came for is well and truly consumed. 

I’m a coward because I would be threatened when I was at my most vulnerable if I ever spoke up.

I’m a coward because whenever anything went wrong you left me to fix it and never offered a helping hand unless it affected you directly.

I’m a coward because you’re both so damn deluded that you have no idea nearly everyone around you is thinking what I’m saying.

No, none of this is on you at all because I’m a coward.

Game

It’s that point you reach in a game where you’re about half way and stuck.

You’re going around in circles and no matter what you can’t seem to find the key to get through the door which is going to unlock the rest of the game for you.

Maybe it’s that key I discarded earlier in the game?

Or it could be right in front of me but I’m just not seeing it?

At any rate I’m stuck and I know it.

I keep walking around and sometimes, for the briefest moment I find something that seems like the answer, riding on the feeling of accomplishment it gives me before coming to the realisation that it wasn’t that at all.

Other times all I find are enemies that I have to fend off.

I’ve been stuck on this level for a while and part of me is wondering if I will ever find the key.

Have I missed my chance?

Is it now somewhere beyond my reach?