The flight from Melbourne to Tokyo was scheduled to leave at around midnight, but John had set his alarm for 9:00 AM to make sure everything was ready. He woke up at 5:00 AM.

For a moment, he lay there, believing that if he didn’t move too much, he might fall asleep again. This, of course, did not happen, and he watched as the faint purple and orange dawn slowly lit up the room with a vaporwave glow. John was absolutely exhausted, and his head was so foggy with sleep it almost hurt. He’d only had four hours of sleep after being up late the night before, researching the town he was meant to be staying in. No matter which way he looked at it, he couldn’t seem to work out where the central area of Tokyo was. When John looked on Google Earth, it all looked like one big city, but that wasn’t possible. Whenever he watched movies or anime set in Tokyo, he wondered which parts of Tokyo they were based on. He couldn’t seem to work it out.

Where did Shibuya end and Shinjuku start? Were they the main areas? What about Ikebukuro and Akihabara? They all seemed like large areas, and some of them weren’t even close to each other. How did Kichijoji fit into all of this? Was it a boring area? Where did everyone go on Saturdays and Sundays when they had their days off?

By the time John had actually gotten into bed, his hours-long internet search had produced more questions than answers. He realized he knew very little about Japan. The anime and manga he had pored over hadn’t really provided much useful insight. In bed, John was hot and bothered. He felt that sense of worry ballooning in his chest, but in the end, he was so exhausted he eventually succumbed to a light and restless sleep.

John had realized he would have no idea how Tokyo worked until he got there. He didn’t even know how he would get from the airport to Kichijoji. Maybe Tadao and Tsukiko would pick him up at the airport. John was going to have to ask Mum and Dad.

By the time he heard Dad shuffling around in the kitchen, John was dozing off and while he thought for a brief moment to get up, it didn’t happen. Once again, he entered a deep and dreamless sleep.

By the time John came to, it was nearly 2:00 PM. The painful exhaustion he felt in the morning when he first woke up was gone. Now, he had to get up.

He was terrified about what was waiting for him in Japan. He had never felt such a combination of excitement and dread in his life. John realized that things were going to be different. He was going to meet new people, even. People he didn’t know existed yet, people that didn’t know he existed yet. What a concept.

The rest of the day was a flurry of packing, cleaning, checking, repacking, worrying, re-checking, and then everything all over again.

When it came the time to head to the airport, the whole family crammed together in the car and sat mainly in silence apart from Theo coming up with some interesting facts about Japan. “Apparently, there’s this little street somewhere in Tokyo with hundreds of tiny little bars where some can only fit three or four people.” Dad seemed to be the only one capable of a response as he drove, “I heard the ceilings are low too because Japanese people aren’t the tallest!” He let out a laugh and looked around as if he expected everyone else to laugh too. All he got was a slap on the arm from Mum, “Stop it, don’t say silly things like that! Tadao wasn’t small at all! He was about 5’10”, wasn’t he?” Dad scoffed, “I’m only joking around, lover!”

They pulled into the airport and shuffled through the international terminal. It was eight o’clock, so there was still a fair amount of time before John had to go through the gates. John checked in his luggage and went to find everyone sitting down at one of the cafes. “So how do I get to their place?” John realized he still didn’t have any instructions. “Oh yes! I nearly forgot. So when you get there tomorrow morning, both Tsukiko and Tadao are going to be at work, but Tadao gave me an email with instructions; he said it’s pretty easy to get to this Kichijoji place from Narita.” Dad was searching his pockets. Mum shot him a look as she pulled some paper out of her bag, “You gave it to me, remember?” John looked at the paper in front of him.

1. Leave international terminal and find Narita Airport Limousine Bus Counter.

2. Get ticket to Kichijoji Station (Should cost 2000 yen).

3. From Kichijoji Station, find the park exit and look for the I 0 I 0 building and walk straight down the little street with lots of shops.

4. At the end of the street, you will see Inokashira Park; enter the park and walk around the lake to get to the other side (go from the left).

5. Walk up a small hill, and you will see Inokashira-koen station on one side and a 7-Eleven on the other side.

6. Please look for a shop that has 万星 written on the sign.

7. Please knock, and Hashimoto-san (man with long hair and a beard) will show you to the house. He has the key to give you.

8. Please make yourself comfortable at home! We will be home later. Sorry to make you wait.

It didn’t seem too complicated. John imagined he would probably be able to get to their place from the airport in about 1 hour, judging by the instructions. When John looked up, he noticed that everyone was looking at him. Dad asked, “So does it make sense?” “Well…as much sense as it can?” “I didn’t know they had 7-Eleven in Japan too…bloody globalization…” Mum seemed to mutter to herself. “You’ll be right, matey,” Dad said without looking so convinced. “If you have any problems though, you can speak Japanese, so you’ll be able to just ask someone, right?” Theo added encouragingly. John felt a pang in his chest. Well, could he? He hadn’t even thought about how good his Japanese actually was. “Oh…yeah, of course!” he blurted out.

The four sat around the table, sipping their drinks as people around them came and left from tables. There was a stream of announcements overhead, giving information about flights going to all kinds of places. Reminders to not leave baggage unattended. Terror warnings, reminders to be vigilant.

It got to about two hours before departure, and the group shuffled towards the doors before customs. John always felt like airports had a lot of emotion, but this spot was particularly emotional. It was a place where people parted ways. Not just with other people, but places and memories too.

See you soon, be safe, please come back, don’t go, this is the last time, goodbye, have fun. I love you more than anything.

Perhaps more bluntly, Dad called it the wailing wall. John had become increasingly aware that his Dad was probably not the best at dealing with intense emotional situations and became a deflector, particularly when things fell into the realm of sadness and loss. John recalled times growing up when whenever there was an emotional scene in a movie or TV show, Dad would loudly exclaim, “Ah! Too corny…they went too far,” before quickly losing interest in what was on. This was a frustrating situation for all involved. There were times when it seemed as if this reaction became almost contagious, with John witnessing other members of the family parroting along, including himself.
The only time John saw or heard Dad cry was when they found out his grandmother had passed. It was Mum that picked up the phone and went over to tell Dad, who stopped for a moment, then running off into the bedroom, letting out whimpers before closing the door behind him. John had never met his Great Grandmother, so he just looked shocked and didn’t say anything while the emotional pandemonium unfolded before him. He felt sad seeing his own father so upset but it also made him deeply uncomfortable because he didn’t know how he could help him.
It seemed that there were some events that could not be brushed off as too corny. Some things had to be experienced as they were intended.

John stood opposite his family. Theo stepped out first, “Have the best time, brother,” he pulled John in close. “Just be yourself, don’t hide.” He whispered. John felt his eyes sting slightly. Why was it that Theo knew exactly what to say?

Dad came in next and put his arm around John, pulling him in and kissing him on the head, “Be good, little fella…” His eyes were watery as he smiled at John. Dad pulled out of the hug and gave John two rough taps on the back before he turned to face the other way.

Finally, Mum came forward. Without a word, she pulled John in. He felt her trembling, “If anything happens, just let me know, okay?” She pulled a tissue out of her bag and dabbed her eyes, “Sorry. But it’s just going to be so quiet at home without you…they have earthquakes over there, so be careful…”

Theo put his arm around Mum; she looked so little and fragile next to him. Mum had a sharp tongue and held her ground, but at the heart of it, she was a deeply emotional, sensitive and caring person.

John didn’t care that he had tears streaming down his cheeks. He was overcome with emotion. There was so much going on inside. A mixture of sadness, excitement, dread, and possibility – and while he cried, he also felt numbness. It was overwhelming.
“See you in a few months!” John waved and turned towards the doors. His lip trembled slightly as he tried to smile at his family. They had gone through so much, and while his parents pissed him off sometimes, he realized how much they did for him and tried their best.

A man at the gate was checking boarding passes. He glanced at John and skimmed over the pass, “You can go through now.”

Until departure, the time went by in a surreal blur.

Passport stamped. Departed Australia.

Browsed shops in international departures.

Ate food to kill time.

As John boarded the plane, he looked around him. There were whispers of Japanese around him. Some of the flight attendants were Japanese too.

He took his seat, and it seemed he had the row to himself. John wished someone would sit next to him, and as each person walked past, he couldn’t help but look slightly hopeful that they might be the one to sit next to him. No one came to fill the seat, but John soon realized that this wasn’t such a bad thing. A flight attendant came over; he was clearly gay and could tell John was too, “Hey mister, that spot is empty, so feel free to lift the armrest up and spread out after we’ve taken off and the seatbelt sign is off.” He winked and walked off. John smiled and thanked him.

As the plane moved along the tarmac and slowly increased in speed, John was becoming increasingly aware that the announcements were bilingual.

The plane sped up and shook slightly before John felt the machine become airborne. John was flying. As of that moment, he no longer existed in Melbourne. John thought about what lay ahead; he couldn’t imagine anything. A rush of emotions came to him before he was overwhelmed with sleep. A tear rolled down his cheek.