“You’re off already? You’re just so busy all the time!”

“See ya.”

It was easy to be intimate together in one setting but I got so in my head that night when you came over that I couldn’t make a move.

Some people know exactly what happened and most do not. That’s how it will stay.

Have you ever gotten high watching Fallen Angels at the Nova on a Monday night? Oh, neither have I.

“I don’t like it when you talk about that you know…”

I don’t like some of the things you talk about but I’m happy to listen because I see how you get enjoyment out of it.

“I wish I was there to see your first time!”

“What does that even mean?”

One of my biggest challenges is allowing space and pause for someone to show interest in me. I fear knowing that it may not work out even though knowing is what I desire most.

The three of us sat on this comfy corner couch with a blanket covering our legs. It was only about half an hour but my soul felt more recharged than it had in a while.

We’re waiting for the Uber you’ve called and I feel the cold go right through me. Embarrassingly I start to shiver, you laugh a little and let me cuddle you for warmth.

After eating hot pot, we all get into the spa as if to recreate the hot pot we just ate. Someone is disassociating in the pool with one of the floating toys and I’m wishing I had chocolate coated pretzels.

We laughed and made fun of each other as we trained then went upstairs and stuffed our faces. Talking for hours about life, the parts of ourselves we’re proud of and the parts that embarrass us.

It’s for moments like these that I take chances on people.

This month was rich, it was deep and intense.

I’m learning to lean more into life and embrace not just the good moments but also the bad and the clumsy.